rachelberet: imagine how weird our society would be if pEOPLE RANDOMLY STARTED SCREAMING MIDSENTENCE LIKE WE DO ON THE INTERNET *midwORD
How do you make holy water?
catholicfemininegenius: Take ordinary water and boil the hell out of it.
aquus: if you dont nap in the middle of the day you are missing out on an entire universe of pleasure
I'm registering as a voter
Me: So I HAVE to be a Republican?
Me: That's coercion. It's illegal.
Mom: Don't care put it down.
Me: I want to put down other though.
Me: The Justice party.
Me: Batman is our founder.
Me: We vote in the name of justice.
Mom: Put it down or I won't feed you dinner.
Me: This has unconstitutional written all over it. I demand my rights. I demand justice.
Mom: I demand a new daughter.
The Post Office is not broke--and it hasn't taken... →
What’s going on here? Right-wing sabotage of USPS financing, that’s what. In 2006, the Bush White House and Congress whacked the post office with the Postal Accountability and Enhancement Act—an incredible piece of ugliness requiring the agency to PRE-PAY the health care benefits not only of current employees, but also of all employees who’ll retire during the next 75 years. Yes, that includes...
esperpoetsociety: why do people even hate other people for their ships like dude we’re all pirates here stop blowing canons everywhere wasrhgafdsf fuck I’m not even a part of any fandoms but I love them for the glorious puns
odair: thebogonoslo: odair: there’s a special place in hell for the person who says ‘present’ when everyone else says ‘here’ Follow this amazing blog, super funny and full of the coolest posts!! there’s a special place in hell for you, too
perlahaha: hey baby, if it’s not too much treble, i’d really like to ‘B’ with you … naturally.
Today at the Subrosa jam there was a van parked nearby that said “we will ship anything anywhere” and I wanted to photoshop it into a tumblr van but I forgot to take a picture :C
Don’t you hate it when your watch breaks and for the first few days of not wearing one you keep forgetting and look at your wrist and it’s like oh look at the time I’m a fucking arm
spongebobnopants: i use ♡ instead of ♥ because it’s hollow and empty just like my actual heart
tltty: when your followers like but don’t reblog pictures of penises i saw that u little horny shit